Tuesday, February 23, 2010

I'm that girl...

... whose feet are always dirty
... who always misplaces her keys
... who usually regrets saying no
... who hangs out in busy places to watch people
... who is sparse with meaningless kisses but generous when hugs are needed
... that usually has candy in her purse
... who never has any money (but always longs for beautiful things)
... who likes to finish peoples sentences
... that has a hysterical evil laugh just because
... that says "I love you" way too much
... whose ideas revolve at such a speed she get's dizzy
... who is quite neurotic about bad breath
... who still likes corny ballads and pop rock from the 1990s
... who thinks she's way tougher than she really is
... who sometimes feels like a crossover of Woody Allen and Psy Duck. On crack.
... who uses way too many commas and parenthesis
... who is like Earth, according to the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: "Mostly harmless"

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I have loads to say. I just really rather curl up with a book and get some sleep. It's been a really long and intense first day of work at Maxim, following an odd as fuck class and including an exhaustive commute. With no lunch and an unhealthy dinner.
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So good night.
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And btw, my latest SG set goes live on Thursday, Feb 25th. Go check it out. It was fun to shoot, that's for sure.

A couple outtakes. Photography by Andrea Lavezzaro

Too much of a good thing is, indeed, wonderful.

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Good Night then. And stop hitting your sibling already.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

*New Suicide Girls set in Member Review: To Do List*

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I just thought I'd bring to your attention that I am, once more, naked on the internet.
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“Lists are really important to me. One could even say that without a script to follow I wouldn't even know how to take off my own clothes. Well, luckily, that's one more item crossed off this to do list.”

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Now, me (and the photographer) being paid for such depends a lot of you, dear SG member, appreciating my nudity and letting the powers that be know, mostly through a comment and the "I loved it" button.
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Your (positive) feedback is quite appreciated. Thank you, and good night.
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xoxo

sweetie

P.s.: This set is brought to you by Andrea Lavezzaro, who beared with me through the heat of last Saturday afternoon, my choice of music (ranging from Dizzy Gillespie to Iggy Pop) and a caffeine high. This post, by a motherfucking amount of beer and a considerable quantity of sugar.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

*It's time for a holiday*

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Busy busy weekend! Today is the last day of the Chinese year, which makes tomorrow the first day of the year of the metal tiger! Tomorrow is also Valentine's day in most of the world (sadly, not in Brazil), which I find a good omen to lovers, since the tiger is linked to virility in Chinese culture.

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Today is also the first day of mardi gras, or Carnaval, as we'll have it in Brazil. Although I don't really go for the modern version, I love the vintage style do-over's, such as this: Baile Esplendor
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I want to go eat long life noodles tomorrow, but I got a SG photo shoot instead. Awell... I'll stuff my face AFTER.
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What better way to start a new year than with a brand new internship? I start at Maxim Brasil right after the holiday. Weee!
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Yup, this shit is bananas! See the pro in between photos in a soon to be sold number of Maxim Brasil.




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and the pink version...


xoxo

sweetie

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

*here's to new beginnings and no loose ends*

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It's my 28th birthday. On the course of the past few days I've shaved half my eyebrows off (how thrilling and fun), found out who are my friends, drank myself to sleep, had a couple breakdowns, danced in a vynil banana costume and dyed my hair pink again.
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I'm broke, jobless (well, formally) and with a college tuition to pay. I'll acknowledge I owe most of my well being (and some of the heartbreak) of the past few years to the Mister. Well, as everyone else, in the end, I'm lost and alone. Empathy is a dream one dreams of constantly. We build castles in the sand with other people, we find joy in things and moments, big and small. We connect. At least we try to. But there is always a darker side we hope will never shine through. The truth? The things we run away from the most are the ones who make us who we trully are. Maybe strength lies in embracing those. Who knows?
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Life is a mind boggling thing. Everyday we fight wars. We go through time chastising ourselves for the things we didn't do, blaming ourselves for not trying harder, wondering if it's not all in vain. One finds oneself over time. Goals, dreams, needs... are all changeable as traits are added to the persona we assume, day after day.
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Who am I? I started counting the many passions that move me: sewing, writing, editing (all sorts of things), singing, acting, dancing, cooking, making IT happen. I, somehow, sometime, must come to terms that one does what one can. Oomph is something one can't learn, and so is talent. All you can learn is technique. All you can look for is inspiration. And pray, as so many other do, for that one chance. Hoping it doesn't pass you by. Because, even if it isn't the one chance world so many preach of, it is a universe of cunning minds. It is not the most deserving, nor the most willing that get's it, it's the one at the right place and time.
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I've heard, many times, that I shine so bright I could light up a room if I really wanted to. Who knows? Light attracts darkness, and time after time, I find myself surrounded by disorder and confusion. Over the years I even came up with this theory that order can only come from chaos, because that's the only way I could make ammends with the facts.
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Pay the piper and blame it on the music. I know I do. So I'm changing my tune. Enough chasing rainbows with Judy Garland. 
I'll be hopeful with Liza...
and try, at least once, right Barbara?
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Who cares what I'm supposed to do? These things change indefinitely. Whatever I'm happy doing, I'll do my best do be damn good at it too.
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Birthday girl spent her day thinking such things. Guess it's time to put some of it into action.
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Good bye, and to all of you, a good night.

xoxo

sweetie